Saturday, October 18, 2014

And Now.... Cat the Great

Sometimes it's necessary to start writing in the middle of the story and then find the beginning and the end. With that in mind, we were on the subway the other day. We were sitting quietly enjoying the weirdos on the train, when David jumped up and started to talk to some guy who was happily reading a book. It was a real book, and it looked like he was almost finished (about 1 pages to go in a 900+ page book.) David started to tell him a story about how a few years ago he saw another guy close to finishing a 1000 page book when he had a vision of Howard Cosell getting on the train and doing play by play commentary about  the other guy finishing the book. The guy was terrified. It's hard for me to explain Howard Cosell, so you will have to go to Youtube and use your imagination.  Remember, I am not your mother so you will have to do your own homework.

Anyway, the reader was terrified.  It was the subway and while we know David is not a lunatic, why should a stranger know that.  The man kept glancing at me and I kept telling David to let the man finish his book.  We left the train before the stranger. And started to laugh about the fact that while this guy was trying to finish his book, David was preventing him from doing this by telling him a story about preventing someone from doing exactly the same thing.  All David could say was, “I probably should have gotten right to the story and not given him all the background.”  And I replied, the guy is just lucky you didn't tell him about your high school reunion in Salt Lake.

So that's the middle, I feel sure my niece Clare, who is a real writer, will forgive my lack of organization.  And how about that Ebola scare. The .President has appointed Ron Klain to be the Ebola Czar.  He's a nice guy and since he was Gore's Chief of Staff, probably has reasonable organizational skills.  But Czar.  Tsar? Apparently in Washington, there are a number of people with the Czar title-- like the drug Czar.  If it were a woman it would be Czarina. And if her first name was Katherine... She would inevitably be Geat.  If you are Russian, or Russian Jewish your picture of a Czar is not someone who coordinates a disease. Especially if they are not wearing a big fur hat. Ron Klain is not a big fur hat guy.

Moving on to either the beginning or the end. We flew to California on Jet Blue. My feeling is that if I can't fly business class, I want to be on a plane where everyone is miserable because there is only one class... Steerage. Let's be honest, when you walk through a plane that has a first and business class you resent all those upper class twits. Even if they are traveling on miles, (and with all the programs tightening their idiotic rules, that will happen less ) how dare they do it when we can't.  Well guess what? Jet Blue now has a business/first called "mint class".  What an outrage!  If I were, for example, the airline Czar, there would only be business class. The airlines would have to suck it up and accommodate a call for equity in travel. There could be a lottery for seats, and if you weren't someone with money you would have to bring your own sandwich-- coffee and soda would still be free. That would be my dictate as Czarina. Oh and I look great in a fur hat.  We're just sayin'... Iris

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